The Secret to Financial Independence: Learning to Love Money
Learning to Love Money is the Key to Creating Financial Independence and Freedom
Do you love money? Or did you read this blog post title and want to turn away? Do you think it’s awful to talk about loving money, greedy even? Did you think to yourself that Minette (me) must be crazy for writing about this topic – you can’t love money, right? Wrong!
Money is a useful tool that makes the world go around – we need money to survive and thrive. I believe we all deserve to be paid well for the work that we do in the world and that there is plenty of money to go around. A few years ago I said to myself, “I genuinely believe that, then why don’t I ever have enough? Why am I creating debt? Why isn’t the Law of Attraction working for me?” Does that sound familiar?
In one of my Facebook groups today, the question was asked, “How do you feel about money?” The conversation was unsurprising. Issues with money caused fear in some women and others proudly shared their tips and tools for making, saving and investing money. There were way more of the “I am afraid” comments than the empowered ones. I am fascinated by what makes people react to the topic of money so negatively. Is it self-worth, family legacy, a past experience? Everyone I know has a money story to share: bankruptcy, debt, inheriting money and losing it all, inheriting money and turning your life around, losing all of your money in the stock market, growing up poor, growing up rich, having just enough to survive… what’s your money story?
I believe that we cannot create the freedom, flexibility and financial independence that we crave until we understand our relationship with money. Until I figured this piece out about myself, all the marketing in the world wasn’t getting me the clients I needed to grow my business.
My Relationship with Money
I don’t know if there is any other subject, except for politics, that can cause such intense feelings in people or cause such trauma in relationships. I was raised in a family where we never talked about money (or much of anything else that mattered, but that’s another story.) I have spent a lifetime struggling with my feelings about money and thinking I just wasn’t any good at money because I didn’t understand math or the stock market. So I didn’t pay too close attention to details. Money just flowed in and out of my life and my bank account. I never had savings or worried about where the next paycheck would come from. I trusted that I would be taken care of and I usually was but it wasn’t always pleasant when I would get myself in a bind and have to borrow money from someone in my family.
I managed to get myself in and out of debt numerous times and I have always created just enough money. I realized that was how I was raised. We always had just enough of everything – never an abundance and all of our basic human needs were met, including feeling loved and secure. Life was good, at least on the surface.
As I matured, went to college and started to work, I was really pretty clueless about managing my money. I am not blaming anyone, I really just didn’t care. I paid my bills, not always on time and I always worked hard but I couldn’t really tell you where all my money went (well, in college it went to clothes, earrings and beer.) I never accepted 100% responsibility for my finances and I certainly didn’t love money. I liked money, I liked having it but I honestly didn’t care enough about it to pay too much attention.
I am a people lover. Nothing matters more to me than my friends and my family. I love meeting new people and hearing their stories. I love connecting people who need to know each other! So when I started my first business, I did what I love to do – I connected with people and I ignored money. My company was making money, good money, but I didn’t pay myself, I didn’t know I needed to or how to manage my cash flow. Looking back now, it’s a miracle I survived in that first business as long as I did. On some levels, I felt like a fraud because I wasn’t personally making money in my business – even though my company was making multiple 6-figures year after year.
Sacred Money Archetype Assessment
Last October everything changed for me when I went to Kendall Summerhawk‘s event: The Secret Energy of Money. I saw the the ad on Facebook and thought, perhaps this will give me the answers I am looking for and help me understand why I am so disconnected from money. At the event, Kendall Summerhawk introduced her Sacred Money Archetype assessment. I have to to admit, I love assessments, I have been a self-help junkie since I was a teenager and have been through years of coaching, therapy and alternative healing processes. As life goes on, there’s always another layer to uncover to help us understand who we are and why we act the way we do.
Learning what my Sacred Money Archetypes are and how my gifts and challenges with money have impacted my business was the single most important thing I learned about myself last year. Since learning this information, I have been able to turn my business around and I have made more already this year than all of last year and it’s only June.
There were 350 women in that room with me, all having the same types of awareness and breakthroughs that I was having around their relationship with money. In fact, I was so impressed and excited about the ability of the Sacred Money Archetypes to help women understand their relationship with money, move past their limited beliefs and learn to make more money that I instantly signed up to become certified in this process.
My top archetype is the Connector (The Inner Relationship Builder) and the Connector is great at being fully supported by others financially, manifesting money when needed, connecting with people in loving authentic ways and terrible at paying attention to financial details and taking responsibility for money. Suddenly the lightbulb went off for me! I wasn’t bad with money, I was just completely disconnected from my personal relationship with money. Just a few shifts have helped me see that I am actually quite good with money, I love money and I am willing to charge what I am worth and get it.
It’s been quite the emotional rollercoaster over the past few months but it’s all paying off. I am also seeing the benefits of working with my coaching clients on their Sacred Money Archetypes – helping them see where they have been holding on to money too tightly, afraid to invest in themselves or in their businesses. I have helped women who are Nurturers realize they are giving away time, money and energy in service to others and not empowering themselves. I have worked with Romantics who create cycles of feast and famine over and over again.
Would you like to know what your Sacred Money Archetypes are and how they are impacting your life, your marriage, or your business? I would love to share this impactful and insightful information with you! You can click here to receive a free copy of the Sacred Money Archetype assessment as well as a sample set of the cards.
What a wonderful article! I recall seeing the ad on Facebook for “The Secret Energy of Money” several months ago. Thanks for sharing your positive experience and what you’ve learned about the “Sacred Money Archetypes.” So glad to see how it has helped you and you in turn, are helping others!
Great article! I agree having a good, healthy relationship towards money is very important. You can love money, but don’t lust over it.
I tend to be careful about how I use the word love, but freely admit, I like money. Thanks so much for introducing me to this Sacred Money Archetype Assessment tool. It’s fun, revealing and useful. I look forward to spending more time with it in the coming weeks (journaling and pondering and reflecting vs. answering the questions in my head). Thanks so much for sharing!
Minette, GREAT article. I so relate. I hope to be where you are on this journey in a year or so. Thanks for elucidating this. I especially connect to your previous life experience of having ‘just enough’ and not being sure how to welcome full abundance.
Thanks for stopping by Chara. I encourage you to take the Sacred Money Archetype assessment. It is so insightful in helping us determine where those feelings of just enough come from and how to from their to welcoming abundance. Hugs!
Kendall’s work is amazing – I’m so glad it was a life-changer for you. Great article BTW! ~hugs~
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Thanks Julia, great to see you here!
Great article!!! I was recently at a networking event where a financial planner explained that she tells her clients, “I’m going to explain your financial situation to you in the simplest way I can. If you don’t fully understand me – I’ll help you find another planner – because the most important thing for your long term security is to understand your financial situation. Your understanding is more important to me, than having you as a client.” At that moment – I realized, I needed to really start to understand my attitude towards money, my retirement plan, the cash flow of my business, etc.!
Lisa Crilley Mallis, COC
time strategy visionary
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What a great attitude from a financial planner, I love it! For me, I had to clear the emotional issues first, then talk to the financial planner so I could be clear about what I want for my future. Thanks for stopping by Lisa!
What an interesting approach to this important topic.
Thank you for sharing your insights!
Dr. Jennifer L. Weinberg, MD, MPH, MBE
Preventive, Lifestyle & Environmental Health Physician,
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Thanks for stopping by Jennifer!
Thanks so much for sharing this article. I am a work in progress with money, working on developing a better relationship with it. And I know that many others are on the same path and are in the same place as I am. Hope to reach the same destination that you have with it sooner rather than later.
Hi Miriam, recognizing our challenges and acknowledging our need to change is a huge first step. I encourage you to take the Sacred Money Archetype assessment, it is so enlightening!
I certainly agree with this entry. Many people fail to realize the interplay between financial planning and psychology. If there are unresolved emotional issues as to money, it is hard to objectively plan for the future. In my own practice, I run into this problem regarding the creation and administration of an estate plan, and long, deep-seeded family issues. Likely, this is the same for financial planning. To summarize, my belief is that it is crucial to work out whatever underlying issues one has when it comes to money, family dynamics, and similar feelings, while creating a comprehensive and effective financial plan.
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Great advice and feedback, Matthew!
Minette, I love when our own life lessons and experiences lead us to our life’s purpose as your has (as well as mine.) What a gift you are offering women to heal their money stories so they can claim abundance.
Thank you Linda Joy!
I appreciated your honesty sharing your experiences and those of others. I love light bulb moments and I could relate to yours: “I wasn’t bad with money, I was just completely disconnected from my personal relationship with money.”
Thank you for being part of the solutions!
Thanks, Joan, lovely feedback!
What a great article. I love how you shared your personal story and mixed it in so well with what you’re teaching. I totally connected with it and there are a lot of similarities with my money experiences. I’ve done a lot of work on my money stuff and got out of debt. I’m working on the “creating more” part :). I’ve done the archetype assessment before, but I didn’t pay much attention to it. I’ll go take it again.
Thanks, Leanne, glad you found some useful information and could resonate with my story!
Awesome article. You’re right, there is so much energy around money, good and bad, depending on who you talk to. I love money. I think it can do some amazing things! I would love to here more about the archetypes. I clicked on the link but it took me to a picture. Glad I found your website!
Thanks, Jennifer, for stopping by and yes, there is lots of energy around money 🙂 I will email you the link for the Sacred Money Archetypes.