Values in Action: Beauty and the Beast

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core values cards

Today’s Values in Action column is about BEAUTY. I saw the word beauty and laughed. Last week I talked about appreciation, especially about self-appreciation. I think the universe is trying to tell me something. My personal journey this year is definitely about appreciating my own beauty in this moment right now. At the same time, BEAUTY is a fabulous theme for 2013 for where I am in my life.

I don’t know about you, but I hope that 2013 is the year I finally slay the last of my personal dragons. For me, that’s my weight. It feels like a tangible, external opponent that I battle. Beauty is the part of me that is holding the flaming sword of unconditional love and fighting for her right to exist. We all have these dragons that we struggle with: each of us is both Beauty and the Beast. I cannot externalize the dragon, she is an integral part of who I am. Perhaps your dragon is fear, low self-esteem, loneliness…

The first step to putting our values into action is to acknowledge both Beauty and the Beast and authentically define what Beauty as a value means to us.

The dictionary definition of beauty of is:

  1. A combination of qualities, such as shape, color, or form, that pleases the aesthetic senses, esp. the sight.
  2. A combination of qualities that pleases the intellect or moral sense.

soulcollage classesTo truly accept beauty, we also have to accept the fire breathing dragons that walk at her side. I adore dragons by the way, so it’s funny that I picked a dragon as the representation of my beast. I have a SoulCollage® card which depicts the dragon as the protector. Perhaps I am more at peace with my dragon than I am willing to admit. I have not quite relinquished the story that I love to tell about being overweight, it’s such an ingrained part of me. If I give up this battle, what will be left?

Beauty is all that will remain. Out of the ashes the phoenix rises. Will you allow BEAUTY to enter into your life in 2013?

I am incredibly fortunate to live in a beautiful place, Santa Barbara, CA. Every day I wake up and the world around me is filled with beauty from the mountains outside my window, to the constantly flowering plants and trees to the nearby beach and ocean. Being here has definitely soothed the savage dragon. It’s hard to worry when surrounded by so much beauty.

On the back of each core values card is a series of affirmations related to the word that will help you put values into action in your life. The affirmations for beauty are:

  • I see beauty everywhere.
  • I reflect the beauty of others.
  • I celebrate my physical beauty and my spiritual splendor.

  Your writing prompts for beauty are simple this week:

1. Where do you see beauty?

Spend time looking around your immediate environment, office, neighborhood, the drive to work, your child’s face. Take some time to acknowledge and appreciate the beauty so prevalent in the world around us. We tend to get so caught up in our lives, we forget to notice what is happening around us and really SEE the world. Journal about what you see, write a blog post about the everyday beauty you notice.

2. How do you reflect the beauty of others?

A very open-ended question isn’t it? No suggestions, just write at the top of your page, I reflect the beauty of others by…

3. How do you honor and celebrate your beauty?

Same as number 2, start writing now! We are all beautiful, we just have to learn to see it and lay our dragons to rest.

When you take time to reflect on beauty as a value, it will have more value in your life. These writing prompts are intended to help you see the value of beauty and to put beauty into action in your life this week.

All of the illustrations that you will see in this column are from my deck of Core Values cards. I originally created this deck of cards as a Christmas gift for my mom. I wanted to create something special, unique and personal. After a few friends saw the cards, I realized most of us want to understand and honor our core values. The deck of cards offers a fun way to do that and is a perfect companion to my book From Fizzle to Sizzle: 4 Crucial Tools for Relationship Repair, available on




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  1. Melissa Miller Young on January 17, 2013 at 4:09 pm

    Minette, thank you so much for this post. I’m preparing to join the gym tomorrow to shed this extra weight that has found me over the past few months, and most importantly to get in shape. I know I have used the weight as a shield on and off in my life reading your line, “To truly accept beauty, we also have to accept the fire breathing dragons that walk at her side.” is exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you!

    • minette on January 17, 2013 at 4:25 pm

      Thanks, Melissa! I have also used weight as a shield and a story I can hide behind. It’s not what other people see about me, they tend to see the beauty, it’s what I see about me that is the most damaging.

  2. Amy Young Miller on January 17, 2013 at 4:16 pm

    Thanks so much for writing this down, Minette. I find that a dragon that I’m always struggling to slay (or ignore, at least) is that as I get older, I don’t feel beautiful any more. My skin is no longer perfect, I’m getting silver hairs, I’m getting wrinkles. Some days it’s really depressing looking in the mirror, yet I know there’s no escaping it. I try to just focus on my beautiful children, the beautiful world around me, etc., and not worry about what is in the mirror, but I must admit sometimes it’s a struggle.

    • minette on January 17, 2013 at 4:27 pm

      That’s a tough one Amy but age is inevitable, isn’t it. I just turned 48, also seeing gray hairs and wrinkles but I am okay with that. Funny isn’t it, I hold up weight as a badge of courage but ignore the signs of aging… so illustrates how we all have our unique dragons. You are so beautiful my blogging friend! Wayne Dyer once said, if there a part of you you don’t like, don’t look at it, focus on the parts you do like!

  3. carolsteinberg on January 17, 2013 at 5:13 pm

    I appreciate the vulnerability and honesty of your post. Beauty is a top value for me–that’s why I’m a painter! I don’t really have a weight problem and the wrinkles aren’t bothering me too much…but I have my own story…sometimes I think it’s more about our fear of shining too much…what would people think if we didn’t have that “issue” whatever it is….

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